I’ve not written in a long while, largely because I have not felt compelled to do so. My blog has been a source of comfort to me in times when I have needed it most. And tonight, I return to this comfortable space to sort through the many emotions that I have been flooded with this weekend. I’m sure you’ve guessed the source already, the tragedy that everyone is either talking about or trying to avoid because of it’s overwhelming sadness. The loss of so many innnocent lives, in one of the places we felt safe–elementary school.

I cannot claim to understand why this young man decided to hurt and kill these innocent children. There was obviously something very wrong with him emotionally that this horror was how he felt he needed to express himself. And I am not looking to get into a gun control or mental health debate. My last thoughts on this young man are that, there seems to be an alarming trend with the people who commit these crimes and we as a society need to take a deeper look at each of these situations to see if we can determine some common ground or symptoms. Then we can work towards a possible solution to stop future mass murders.

At my core though, I am not routinely thinking about the man who caused all of this heart break. No, my attention and my heart has been with the parents and families of the young victims. That is the part that I am having the hardest time coping with. What these kids went through, and what they endured in their final moments just takes my breath away it hurts so much.

I just want to scream “WHY?” why did these poor kids die? And I know that there is no reason, that this was a random event, but the question is still there pounding in my heart and mind, WHY??

My heart aches for their parents, who instead of finishing Christmas shopping and wrapping gifts, they are tasked with picking out coffins and burial plots. They won’t get to see their child opening gifts next week. Instead they will bring them flowers.

When the media finally stop talking about this, when something worse or something they deem more interesting occurrs they will move on. But these families, they will remain devastated for years to come. And eventually, people will stop coming around and offering help, they will assume that after an “acceptable” time that these families will work past their grief and move on. Society is funny that way…..

Out of all of this, I have decided that the best way for me to honor the victims of this event is not to remember the name of the man who killed them. But to remember one child’s name for the rest of my life, that when I am doing something I will include a special thought for him so that he is never forgotten. Jack Pinto is the little boy I will always remember.

I hope you will join me in choosing to remember this event differently than the rest. Don’t just focus on the killers and the hell that they have ensued upon the innocent. Remember the ones that they affected, the people who should really matter. Maybe if we took this approach, more and more the media wouldn’t glorify such tragedy and maybe the occurance of these things would go down…. just a thought.

-EH

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